What Spiritual Direction Means to me

In my practice, I define spiritual direction as the process of cultivating a relationship with a higher power which gives us resources and energy to draw from. This definition may seem like it necessitates the existence of a specific God, but in fact anyone can benefit from spiritual direction if they are willing to believe that there are resources available to us that are not visibly present. We do this all the time already where we understand the value in friendships though that value itself is not visible or quantifiable. Research teaches us that people who are isolated from friendships and relationships are significantly less happy and fulfilled than those who are engaging in friendships and relationships. Spirituality, like a friendship can greatly improve our quality of life and requires work and a constant “practice” to maintain.

What then is the value of this spiritual friendship? Obviously, many of us are very fulfilled in our friendships and relational lives. A friendship with the spiritual is less about the fun and community feeling interpersonal friendships give us and more focused on insight into ourselves and how we make meaning with our experiences. It is about establishing a relationship that provides us with limitless opportunities to grow and take risks, sustaining us in our everyday work and inviting us to re-imagine what our lives could look like. Unlike interpersonal friendships, spirituality cannot become annoyed with us or feel that we are too needy or draining; rather, it is an ever-present ear to our struggles and faithfully provides us with the strength to persevere through hard times and good times alike.

A relationship with the spiritual moves beyond reflection and into discernment, deciding what to take up and what to put down. A healthy spirituality is one that teaches us to separate the sensational from the spiritual when we interact in our everyday lives. What is the root of our fear? Is it simply the buildup of previous sensory information or is it that voice that lies beyond our senses? What is the root of our desire to engage in something? Is it out of a social obligation to “do right” or is it coming from that space beneath our senses, acknowledging that the task is difficult, but it is part of our call and our purpose?

My definition of what this spiritual presence guides us into doing stems from the work of Womanist theologians. The spiritual in this sense desires for the flourishing of all life, human and ecological and has a preferential love for the marginalized and oppressed. A healthy spiritual relationship demonstrates a desire for all these things, but exercises practices within an individual that are sustainable and in line with our own individual journeys and purpose. We cannot do everything, and therefore a strong element of discernment is essential for anyone seeking to perform the work of justice.